June was the month when I started trying new things. I started taking walks as part of creating an exercise routine. I went on a diet. I was writing a lot of poetry this year and June was a time when I was compiling them together. I was a group leader for my church’s Vacation Bible School. And with all the new things I was doing, I was starting to not recognize myself. Or rather, started seeing different parts of me. It was during June that I recognized things I needed to improve on and reminded myself that God will guide me and provide for me.
One poem I wrote back in April was “Since the Last Time I Cut My Hair” which was about how I wanted to prove myself to a toxic friend about how mature I thought I was. How I was tired of waiting. But now, I realized the importance of all that waiting. I needed the time to rid myself of that toxic friendship, time to recover from that friendship, and time to find my voice again. The time I had in college helped me to relearn my faith, but the time I spent after college put my faith to the test. This year was about me finding my place in the world and that began with me trying new things. And yes, I did cut my hair during this month. But I cut my hair on my own terms this time.